I try to be a perfect friend to everyone... I try.
I try to be just a friend to everyone.
I don't show "more than friends" emotions and gestures.
Always greeting you with a smile on my face, pretending you are just a friend to me, knowing you are not.
I'm just the cheerful, bubbly and always smiling girl.
But I'm not.
Theres just this part of me that aches.
Aches for you.
So much.
So much.
I feel this immense sadness in me.
How did I gave part of my heart to you ?
I don't understand.
I don't want to.
I don't wish to.
Its just an illusion.
Not real.
Tried nonchanlance.
It doesn't work.
You creep into my mind at the most unexpected times.
And keep my mind running, running and running till it hurts.
I can't confide in anyone.
Not anyone close to me at all.
Because its suppose to be a secret.
You are my secret.
Do you know yourself ?
You are this heavy stone I wanna lay down.
How can I do that when you are near to me ?
The temptation of the phone is always there.
Whenever I'm without company of friends.
I miss you.
Even with them.
I still miss you.
I'm a very reserved girl.
My heart is guarded.
